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21 Funny Facebook Status Ideas

funny facebook status

21 status ideas

Can’t think of something witty or comical to say? Borrow one of these 21 funny facebook status ides,  you are bound to get a laugh. Ok, here they are in no special order.

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  1. Just caught my wife in bed with my best friend. I threw her out, then grabbed him and shouted, “Bad Dog! Bad Dog!”
  2. I never understood why people say booze is just empty calories. Sure, there’s no real nutritional value, but those calories are far from empty, they’re full of fun and awesomeness.
  3. I am selling my roomates crap on eBay
  4. I’ve seen pictures of you naked on the internet
  5. just won the nigerian lottery!
  6. I just read last year 4,153,237 ppl got married. I don’t want to start any trouble, but shouldn’t that be an even number?
  7. Is a little down since nobody wished her a happy birthday today, which isn’t surprising really, since it isn’t my birthday.
  8. Slept like a baby last night…. Waking up every 3 hours crying for food.
  9. Realized that the average woman would rather have beauty than brains, because the average man can see better than he can think.
  10. Claiming a product promotes weight loss when combined with diet and exercise is like claiming it grants wishes when used with a leprechaun.
  11. Just found out a bicycle can’t stand on its own because it’s two-tired.
  12. Editing wikioedia entry for insurance, company that will lend you an umbrella when the sun is shining, and who asks for it back when it starts to rain.
  13. Thinking some people are like slinkies. They bring a smile to your face when you push them down the stairs.
  14. I still miss my ex….but hey my aim’s getting better!
  15. I ran into my ex this weekend at the mall… her car is totalled, WIN!
  16. So poor that I can’t even pay attention
  17. I’m taking a shower totally naked
  18. Realizing that if you can’t beat them, you should use cheat codes.
  19. Thinking that he who throws dirt is losing ground.
  20. Selling balls on ebay, just got married.
  21. It takes many nails to build a crib, but only one screw to fill it.

If you have your own funny status please post them up as comments below we would love to hear them.