Can’t think of something witty or comical to say? Borrow one of these 21 funny facebook status ides, you are bound to get a laugh. Ok, here they are in no special order.
- Just caught my wife in bed with my best friend. I threw her out, then grabbed him and shouted, “Bad Dog! Bad Dog!”
- I never understood why people say booze is just empty calories. Sure, there’s no real nutritional value, but those calories are far from empty, they’re full of fun and awesomeness.
- I am selling my roomates crap on eBay
- I’ve seen pictures of you naked on the internet
- just won the nigerian lottery!
- I just read last year 4,153,237 ppl got married. I don’t want to start any trouble, but shouldn’t that be an even number?
- Is a little down since nobody wished her a happy birthday today, which isn’t surprising really, since it isn’t my birthday.
- Slept like a baby last night…. Waking up every 3 hours crying for food.
- Realized that the average woman would rather have beauty than brains, because the average man can see better than he can think.
- Claiming a product promotes weight loss when combined with diet and exercise is like claiming it grants wishes when used with a leprechaun.
- Just found out a bicycle can’t stand on its own because it’s two-tired.
- Editing wikioedia entry for insurance, company that will lend you an umbrella when the sun is shining, and who asks for it back when it starts to rain.
- Thinking some people are like slinkies. They bring a smile to your face when you push them down the stairs.
- I still miss my ex….but hey my aim’s getting better!
- I ran into my ex this weekend at the mall… her car is totalled, WIN!
- So poor that I can’t even pay attention
- I’m taking a shower totally naked
- Realizing that if you can’t beat them, you should use cheat codes.
- Thinking that he who throws dirt is losing ground.
- Selling balls on ebay, just got married.
- It takes many nails to build a crib, but only one screw to fill it.
If you have your own funny status please post them up as comments below we would love to hear them.